There's One in Every Family - The Perfect Aunt

Note:  This post was written for the Carnival of Genealogy, 100th Edition, sponsored by Jasia at Creative Gene.


Every woman I knew in my family growing up was married or widowed. But only one had remained single past 21 years old. In our family, she was known as an "old maid." At the time, this now very much outdated term really meant nothing to me - I simply accepted that it meant "older and still unmarried." The woman in this story is Vertie Porter, my paternal great-aunt and one of my grandmother's two sisters. Vertie was a teacher, a career woman before her time. When she was a young woman, she taught in rural schools in Arkansas, Missouri, and Mississippi. A petite woman, her size defied her strength and determination in dealing with being a woman in a man's world Pre-1960. But possibly it was also that strength and determination that allowed her to overcome the intense grief that she experienced early in life. According to my family's account of the story, Aunt Vertie was engaged to a fine young man who had stolen her heart and presented her with a beautiful platinum diamond engagement ring. But the wedding never occurred - her betrothed died in an automobile accident before they could be married. It was after this tragic incident that Vertie made a choice to never marry -- anyone. She continued to wear the gorgeous engagement ring given to her by her suitor, and she immersed herself in her life's work, teaching. In her later years, she moved to Memphis, Tennessee to work and lived with her widowed sister until her sister's death, when she returned to her native Mississippi.

Throughout her life, my Aunt Vertie was the perfect aunt. Since she had no children of her own, Aunt Vertie always remembered my brothers and me with cards and gifts on our birthdays and at Christmas. I still remember the tiny china tea set that she gave me for my 6th birthday. I thought it was the most precious gift in the world, something beautiful and fragile that she must have purchased in some exotic far-away place. As a young girl, I was fascinated by Aunt Vertie's perfect make-up, jewelry, and the beautiful dresses and hats that she wore when she visited us. And I will never ever forget that beautiful diamond ring! Although she would allow me to look at it and turn it on her tiny finger, she would never ever allow me to try it on - no matter how many times I asked. Oh, how I wanted to see what it would look like on my hand! Since neither my mother nor my grandmothers owned diamond rings at the time, Aunt Vertie's ring was the first diamond that I ever saw.


My Aunt Vertie died of complications of Alzheimer's disease when she was in her late 70's. Without a doubt, her last years were difficult, but she had lived a productive and happy life. No, it did not involve a husband or children, but she always remained close to her family. She may have been known in our family as "an old maid" and my father's "maiden aunt," but I will always remember her as a beautiful, kind woman of strength and character who was unafraid to make her own way in the world.

Vertie's Ring - A Story of Lost Love

This is a picture of my paternal grandmother's sister, my great aunt, Vertie Porter. Born September 22, 1896, in Attala County, Mississippi, Vertie was named for her maternal grandmother, Malverda (also spelled "Melverda" and "Melvertie") Gibson. During the early portion of her adult life, Vertie was a schoolteacher. After teaching school in several places outside of Mississippi, including Stuttgart, Arkansas and in St. Louis, Missouri, Vertie moved to Memphis, Tennessee. There she worked at the University of Tennessee Dental School and lived with her older widowed sister, Etta Porter Parker, until Etta's death from cancer in October 1966.

Although Vertie was an attractive and educated woman, she never married. According to family stories, Vertie had fallen in love with someone in her early twenties, and the couple became engaged to be married. But before they were married, Vertie lost her husband-to-be in an automobile accident. I don't recall ever hearing her fiance's name, so unfortunately I am unable to include it in this post. It seemed that Vertie never met anyone else who could measure up to her beloved, so she never married.

For as long as I can remember, Vertie still wore the beautiful platinum filigree and diamond engagement ring her deceased fiance had given her as a symbol of his devotion. As a young girl, I believed Vertie's ring was the loveliest one in the world, certainly the most beautiful I had ever seen at the time. And on a few occasions when I was young, she even allowed me to try on the ring. My, how it sparkled! When I asked my mother some years ago if she knew what happened to Vertie's ring, she told me the sad story of how Vertie had given it to a niece who allegedly had later sold it.


Recently, I found the second photograph in this post while going through a box of uncatalogued old photographs that belonged to Vertie's sister, my paternal grandmother. Although there are no clues written on the back of the photograph, I believe it is a picture of Vertie and her fiance, and likely one of only a few that may exist. Based on the manicured foliage in the background and the pergola under which the couple were photographed, my best guess is the pictures were taken in the Spring in a park.


Vertie lived almost fourteen years after her sister, Etta, died in Memphis. After retiring from her job, Vertie later returned to Mississippi to live near relatives. And in August of 1980, one month short of her 84th birthday, Vertie Porter died.

Five Men from Helena, Arkansas

This photograph, as well as a call for assistance to determine my Porter family's relationship to the men in the picture, was first published in a post I wrote for the Attala County Memories blog in September 2008. The photograph, actually a "picture postcard" that I found in my grandmother's photo album, is my submission to Smile for the Camera, 9th Edition, "Who Are You - I Really Want to Know." Someone long ago wrote the names of the men in the picture on the back of the postcard, but what I really want to know is how these men fit into my Porter family tree. The five men in the photograph were identified by the note on the postcard as David Porter, Payton Porter, David Blair, Hall Hart, and John Shearfield. The card has no stamp and no postmark, so it is safe to assume it was never mailed. Written in the space intended for a mailing address is "From Ellie to Vertie, Helena, Ark." Vertie Porter was my paternal grandmother's sister, my great-aunt, and she once taught school in Arkansas. But who was Ellie? And why did Ellie send Vertie Porter a picture of these five men? It goes without saying the two Porter men must have been relatives, but were the other three men relatives, too? And finally, why would my grandmother continue to hold on to this picture long after her sister's death?

Three Sisters, Three Lives

Right: Etta PorterParker and Vertie Porter, circa 1925

Daughters of J. J. Porter and Margaret Meriweather Porter, and sister of Lelia Porter Branch, pictured below. Lelia Porter Branch was my paternal grandmother.

Vertie, Etta, and Lelia were the daughters of John James Porter and Margaret Meriweather Porter, and all were born a few years apart around 1900. Lelia Porter was my grandmother. The three sisters were close growing up, but as adult women, they would venture down three separate and unique paths.

Lelia (pictured to the left) married my grandfather when she was only eighteen, and my father, their only child, was born exactly one year and one day later. Her entire life centered around being a wife and a mother, and later, a doting grandmother to three grandchildren. And she never forgot her roots in Attala County.

As a young woman, Vertie became engaged to the love of her life, but life dealt her a cruel blow when he was killed in an accident shortly before they were married. This event seemed to shape the remainder of her life. She continued to wear her engagement ring on her left hand and never married. According to her family, Vertie never met another suitor who could quite measure up to her deceased fiance. After studying at a normal college, Vertie became a schoolteacher and taught school in several states, including Louisiana, Arkansas, and Missouri. Eventually, she retired from teaching and began working at the University of Tennessee Dental School in Memphis, Tennessee, where she retired during her mid-sixties. Vertie was well ahead of most women her age. She was a career woman, an independent thinker, and she believed in women's rights from an early age.

Etta, the oldest of the three sisters, married a local man named Fred Parker, but that marriage would end after only a few years of marriage. She became a very young widow when Fred fell to his death while working on the construction of a steeple at a Memphis church. Sadly, they never had children. After Fred's death, Etta began working as a nurse's aid at the old Baptist Hospital in Memphis (now Baptist Medical Center) and continued to work there until she retired at age 65.

In their later years, Etta and Vertie lived together, sharing expenses in their retirement.

Three sisters, three separate paths, one descendant.